What Is a Real Friend ?

What does the word friend mean to you? Take a few seconds and think about it.

The word friend to me means someone you can trust and share your thoughts with without judgement. Friends make time for each other and help each other in times of need. If you want to talk or need some advice, a friend welcomes you to call anytime — you don’t need to set up an appointment three weeks out to make the conversation happen. A true friend will even tell you the things you need to hear even when it hurts or might be painful. And they certainly don’t go talking about you to others behind your back. A real friend is a person you can count on no matter what happens. 

Do real friends exist anymore?

I have lots of friends. Most of these people I connect with via social media. We follow each other and maybe even have short conversations online. Every once in a while we might even hang out at conferences or set up a call to talk shop. There’s nothing wrong with these relationships and I sincerely value them all, but most of them don’t feel like real friendships. Maybe because they usually don’t fit my ideals stated above.

The truth is that even though I might have a lot of connections online or offline, I feel lonely. I want to have a solid group of people that I can count on to have my back, even when the crap hits the fan. I desire to have friends who I can call day or night, without an appointment or feeling like I am distracting them, and who will give me honest advice or a swift kick in the pants. I need people who won’t stab me in the back while smiling and telling me they love me at the same time.

It’s not just me who wants this either. There are some of you who want this too!

I know because I’ve had conversations with people who say they want real friends in their lives. They are lonely too and feel like they are on an island by themselves. These folks (maybe even you) want friends they can sincerely count on.

It’s sad that we have the most amazing technology at our disposal, yet we seem to be the most “disconnected” and loneliest people on the planet. Are we too consumed with our own lives that the lives of our friends are a small blip on the radar? Being busy is an excuse. You have to make the time for the things you say are important in your life. Building real friendships couldn’t be an easier these days, but it doesn’t seem to be happening.

Are you looking for real friends?

Maybe you feel the same way or maybe you don’t. Perhaps I’m just working through some middle age psychotic episode or my testosterone has been replaced with an enormous amount of estrogen. Whatever. The point is this. We all need real friends in our lives. We can lie to ourselves and say that we don’t need them, but I think we do.

What do you think?

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